I Almost Did It…

I need to apologize to all pregnant women out there.
I almost committed a “felony”, as far as I was concerned when I was pregnant.
Tonight, we at dinner at Acupulco. (I want to go to there. Num num num num num.) Anyway, hello pregnant waitress who stops by our table to ask how old Ollie is. I turn to look at her, and there’s that perfect little basketball like bump just inches away. And I just wanted to reach out and touch it. Touch that little baby. And do the whole cooing-precious baby-wanna cry thing that all expectant mothers hate, when random strangers all of a sudden invade their privacy and feel no shame in placing their hands all over your abdomen. (Which happens to be a place that in my experience no woman is ever happy to have anyone touch, especially without consent, because – am I right ladies? – this is the one place that always needs the most WORK.
I managed to keep my hands on my own baby, but inquire politely about hers.
I decided right then and there that midwifery would be AWESOME, because I could touch baby bellies all day long and no one would mind or think I was a crazy “stranger”. And even if they did, it’s my JOB, so pfft.
Anyway, after a long day of shopping, Nick, Ollie, and I arrived home around 9. I quickly shedded Ollie’s layers except his onsie, changed a diaper, and managed to lay him down just in time for him to wake up and decide to start crying. Ug. So I get him all situated, mobile on, and sneak from the room. He cries for a bit, then stops. Then cries for a bit, then stops. He does this for HOURS. This is what happens whenever his bedtime schedule gets messed up. Nick and I stayed up watching a movie, and when we decided to head to bed, I was picking up pillows off the living room floor when Nick went to turn Ollie’s lamp out. He whispers “Come here!”, which immediately startled me. I wasn’t sure what was wrong, but I went trotting towards the partially open door, and the sight inside was soooooo precious.

At some point he not only managed to roll over, but turn himself sideways in the crib, too. The picture quality isn’t the greatest because I didn’t want to use the flash and wake him up. Nick rolled him over and repositioned him after I had my fill, and then we shook our heads and chuckled on our return down the hall. We love that kid.
It was a long, boring day for him. He gets EXTREMELY bored in the car lately. He’ll start screaming and you’ll change his diaper, give him a bottle, do everything you can think of, and he’ll appear fine. You’ll return to the driver’s seat, and the screaming commences. And it will continue until either you go so far that he can’t fight it and falls asleep (Trust me, it’s quite a distance!), or you return to the backseat. He’d much rather converse all day then ride in the car. The poor guy didn’t even get any solid foods today. I’m just not sure how to do the whole baby-food-on-the-go thing. But he gets cranky when he doesn’t get his solid foods.
At one point the old trick work. I busted out “No Air” by Jordin Sparks, and his hysterics paused for the song, where he listened quietly, and then resumed his screaming as soon as the last note died.
I find it fascinating that I, sitting in the driver’s seat, can merely pick a song on my iPod, press play, and soothe my child without touching him, making eye contact… virtually doing anything! Music is amazing. Unfortunately, I need to broaden Ollie’s “comfort” songs, because there are only a few. (And Nick hates them all.) “No Air”, “Mercy” by Duffy, “My Love” by Justin Timberlake, “The Garden” by Mirah, and “Boys with Girlfriends” by Meiko. All songs that I was listening to quite a bit in his first month.
Anyway, my brain is mush and I’ve been yawning so hard my eyes tear up for HOURS. Goodnight all.

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